The germ of an idea.

The germ of an idea can be, for me at least, one of the most frustrating parts of the entire creative process. I often find myself in the company of a germ, but without much of anything else to build it on. And there have been several times, as is the case currently, where I have several germs, and a drive, but nothing to actually put down on paper.

It doesn't help that my usual idea soundboard isn't around at the moment, either, but mostly it's down to the fact that I'm really struggling to turn these otherwise interesting concepts into fully formed stories.

And I start to wonder, during these periods of... creative constipation (I wish I'd come up with a better phrase than that, but it's written down now, so there's no turning back, it's not like I can just press backspace till it's gone and reword it) that I find myself trying to work out just why this happens.

I think it comes down to a multitude of different reasons, really. Maybe, in part at least, this is just a key aspect of my own personal creative process, I know I've written about it before in the past, and it always goes away, and that's fine. And maybe, in part as well, it's just something that happens when an idea isn't strong enough, and if so then great. I'll eventually get the hint and move on.

But there's an interesting one that keeps popping up in my head from time to time now, a different reason for why I find myself struggling quite so much with this "germ syndrome" more recently... and that's that I've sort of spoiled myself.

Making a feature film was incredible. The sense of pride and relief and overwhelming achievement I felt once it was all done and dusted and up on Amazon Prime was really quite indescribable. And then I went and made another one, which sits in the edit and I keep looking at and wondering how to improve. And there in lay the problem, I fear.

I just want to make more features. Shorts don't seem to cut it anymore. And while I love them, and they're great for experimentation (and they're sooooo much easier to flipping make!), I just want to tell feature length stories, and all my ideas are coming at me pre-formatted for that.

So, maybe I need to take a step back and bash out some shorts. What do you think? There's always the overstuffed digital file of random crap that I can go to for inspiration (plus I have a notepad by my bed that I jot ideas down into late at night). Maybe shorts are where I need to dump my head for a little bit before I go back to these bigger ideas.

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© Alex Secker 2018