What's the most difficult part of film-making? You might assume it's the planning, finding locations, preparing the shots, putting together a cast and crew, ensuring that all the pieces are in place and ready to film. You might assume that it's the actual filming itself. The process of shooting and re-shooting shot after shot until eventually you're ready to go into the edit. You might even assume that its' the editing, going through hours of footage and piecing together the different parts to make a cohesive and enjoyable whole. You'd be wrong on all counts.
No, the most difficult part of film-making is trying to get to those stages in the first place. It's in the struggle of putting the project into a position where it is possible to shoot and edit and make a film. It's the making of the making of the film. It's that bit before that no one talks about. The bit that film-makers so often skip over when they're asked about their big break.
"I wrote a script and then raised some money and we made the film" is something I've heard I don't know how many times on behind the scenes interviews. Part of me is infuriated by it. I want to grab them and scream, "But how! How did you raise the money! Why won't any of you discuss that part!" Thing is, it's relatively easy to make a film, you just need the drive and passion to do it. Of course, you also need other people with that same drive and passion, and that's where it starts to get tricky. Money helps.
I think part of the problem here is that I have a script I really believe in. It's something I've spent a long, long time working on and a story I've been refining and refining until it's finally at a point now where I feel like it needs to be made. That might sound a little absurd, but it's how I feel. It's a story I really want to tell, one that I'm passionate about and I can see clearly. One that I strongly believe can and will be brilliant.
I also have a cast I think will work well together. They're all wonderful and they all do a lot of great stuff with their roles. We've had some interesting discussions about their characters and it's been a really fun process (even if it is a blood nightmare to get them all together and they haven't all actually met each other yet). The crew, at least what crew we have at the moment, are also splendid and are people I trust and know can deliver. There's just this niggling feeling.
Things aren't happening. They're just not moving along like I would like. There seems to be a lack of enthusiasm that concerns me. By this point I had hoped to have pushed out crowdfunder out, I'd have hoped to have all the crew in place and I'd have hoped to have totally locked down the scenes and blocking and things so I could be focusing more on the actual technical sides of production, and yet we're still no closer than we were two months ago.
It's a little disconcerting when I'm so keen on the idea that no one else appears to be, and I worry, maybe a little too much, about what that might mean.
I'm sure it will work out in the end, but as it currently stands I feel like I've stalled and I can't go any further without the help of the other members of the team. It's a dark feeling, like something hangs over my head and desperately needs to be resolved.